Sunday, November 30, 2008

Never Seen poly boys With such style!!

I am a Very Reticent person, I have finaly found the word that is BEST EVER DESCRIPTION OF ME AWESOME! you should look it up if you'd like to know what it means, unless you are a smarty pants who already knows what it means(MalianaHead!). Of Course it isn't Exact, but it is Quite Accurate. I don't like to talk much to people, because I dont like to waste my breath or genius on unappreciative homeless mofo's who would be completely incapable of understanding a Word I said (even those I do speak to sometimes(ok ALL the Time) dont understand a word I jus se!); that is why it takes me so long to actualy speak, or "warm up" to people. I don't like speaking when the person the words are for wouldn't really care to listen, Unless said person is a dear friend or family member, then I force them to listen(as much as is humanly possible, like repeating it over and over or making the words louder and louder hehe).

EXAMPLE: When a person of acuantance passes you on the street or in the hallway they say "Hi how are you?" just in passing, not really caring for an answer, but rather merely following social protcol for what they assume is a polite and sociable way to behave. I personaly think its quite rude and impertinant(not really this word, I just felt like throwing it in because its a coolo Word). I think this way because its like Cutting you off, "hi how are you-" walk away, it So Rude! I normaly dont dignify such greeting with a verbal response, but rather just smile and sometimes say hi. This might seem Snobbish to you, but I don reall Cair Eh?!!?

this leads me on (maybe, might not though, I have quite a jumpy random thought process) to something else, Thats something being.... Oh yeah ( i just forgot, and then remembered HAHA) I have such a hard time expressing myself, mostly because I am afraid; Of What? I am not entirly sure, but when it comes to expressing something FEar Grips my insides and SQUeezes so hard that I just sit there in silence witha confused tormented expression on my face(okay, that might be a lie, but its a fun lie); I think it might have something to do with the reaction to my expression. The reactions on those few occasions I do express something are often bored, or distracted, like the persons do not care, and that I cant stand, so because no one seems to care I keep my yap shut and dont share my thoughts, Like Ever. You might think I do, but i dont. you know in Click when he fast forwards, and goes into autopilot(or watever) thats what happens with me, I think something, but dont share what I am really thinking, I share some auto pilot stuff, random stuff that will make the person go HUH?!? I AM SO CONFUSED, then I will go EXACTLY! and thats the end of that chapter!

And Finaly, to my point, THE POINT, A POINT, some random whatever...

I don't know how to comfort. Its so Funny, (in my head anyways, whenever anything happens I am like uh.. but Laughing in my head at how I dont know how to react) but when I see someone in need of comfort, I kind of just stare awquardly with big eyes, then avert my eyes at my embarresed ineptability. LOlerskates, and it also goes for lacking in being able to be comforted, Example:::
At church the day after my Grammy Ofa Died, a Tongan Boy in my sunday school class said, "oh melanie, when did your grandma Die?" (something along those lines (he said it in a way that suggests normal conversation)) and I replied "yesterday" and quickly looked at the floor because I started to cry. After church, outside on the bench that is located there I saw the tongan boy and his older brother sitting. As I walk towards the parking lot (the bench is located somewhere there) I hear the older one say ".. you faggot!" and he gets up and sees me and comes over and gives me a hug and says " I heard about your grandma, Thats no good". My Reaction was to stiffly accept the hug and say thanks with that stiff aquardness that is my own reaction to most things foreign to me. To be fair, it might have been because he was (and is) a totaly Handsome Mr. Man and I am(or was (getting better every day! haha)) just sucha nerd face oh my gosh a boy talked to me (ok not that bad) kinda gal.

When it comes to Comfort I guess I just feel a bit like I am watching it from a distance, and unable to react appropriatly because I dont know how to, it feels foreign and alian to me; Like my hombre Legolas in FotR, when Boromir is Dying in Aragorns arms, and Legolas comes and watches from affar, he looks on in an observant way because it is completely odd to him, not happened before, I love it. Oddly enough I have much feelings in my being, and i feel deeply for people, so my inability to comfort is a literal pain, It pains me to not be able to comfort others when they are in pain, or sad, or lost, or any other unpleasant things. Unnecesary heart ache, wish I knew how to cure

I'm think of charlie chaplan's words "we think too much and feel too little" That is the case with most people, but not I, I think too much and feel too much too, hahaha but who'd a thought? you cant really tell hahaha oh wellll. One last thing!

I was told about this group today, they funny, called Spacifix and I do declare Never Seen poly boys With such style!!


Monday, November 24, 2008


Soo I have a perdicament that is needing to be predicted accuratly, Sharpish!

So HEre it is

Do I Skip work and watch twilight as many times as humanly possible till I have to go to work again,


Not miss work and go the saturday after twilight is released to watch twilight as many times as humanly possible till I have to go to church (AHHHHHHHHHHHH THE ANGUISH OF MY TORMENTED SOUL!)

ok Let me Know! hahahah

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Awesomer than thou

Almost Forgot, I saw this Picture, I dont know if anything has been done to it, it sure looks like somethings been done, but its So Awesome, Like the best picture Ever, her Eyes are so Pretty! (like mine and my daddy's HAHAHAH! I dont have a fat head, I just love my eyes)

Here is one of henry hahaha

these kids are such posers, just thought You should all Know. I envy them that too haha such outgoing Fat Heads, And I say it in the nicest way possible




Friday, November 21, 2008

click click click click maliana got a really cool pic..ture

hmmm Grown up, I guess, in the sense that I dont think like a child anymore... well.. THIS is Hard to utskira harharhar. moving Along

OOOOO Henry Graduated from Australian 12th Grade on Friday! that was so exciting, and yet very boring. It was very exciting because Henry was graduating! and there was drumming and digaredo/!

the first video is some digeradoing and the second one is some more, you can hear the drumming start just at the end of the second video, but the memory card was full and I was full flipping out hahahah poor lete

I thought it was so Amazing! because I havn't really heard a digaredo be played, but this was so cool, and then they added the poly drums and it was so flippin Amazing! These little (12 to 15 yr olds probably) boys were playing their drums like nobodies business. Polynesian kids always amaze me, even though the means are usualy terrible, the outcome is usualy always Flabergasting; four year old kids reciting the first three articles of faith(or other long things) by memory, 11 year old girls dancing like pro's, young boys doing haka's and spear dances and drumming - K Moving on!

but then there were speeches given by a principle who didnt really care and 17 year old kids, So, Yeah...

I envy him(henry), and lete, they get to have something I won't have, Ever, Ever ever. Lucky Dogs!

So I've decided on a Date, The 26th of June, Three years after I arrived i will leave. I'm affraid of telling people, because Thats just how I am, not a spine in my body HAHAHA the lesser of two evils? I'm not refering to the voting, but the evil and spine.

I'm so tired, not in the physical sense, I just want to go home, where home is I know not, Maybe I ruined the world for myself with my thoughts, and overly high expectations of my fellow humans and their environs.. But I dont want to lower my thought standards, What Would that Do to mE and My ?!?

I just dont know anymore


Thursday, November 20, 2008

I Caught Myself

Down to you
you're pushin and pullin me
Down to you

But I don't know what I want

I LOVE ALL THAT IS TWILIGHT, AHHHHHHHHHH I was just about to go look at Miriam's recent blog, BUT just a few seconds before I clicked it I read twilight was so GOod, AND I EXPLODED WITH JEALOUSY!!!! I am going to have to close my Eyes and Ears for like nearly a month (three or so week) so that I don't cry and die and explode and fall over.. but considering that I will be driving, walking and handling sharp things with my eyes and ears closed All of these things are inevitable; BUT if these things happen because of my closed eyes and ears rather than my twilight's ruined, it will be much better, because my twilight's ruined would mean ANguish to my Soul1!! but the other thing is just my injured self... and others maybe, hmmm On to Other matters

I bought the soundtrack the other day and totally forgot about the poster thing, it was the lame poster of Bella and Edward, I should have gotten the Jacob one hehehahahah I've got this feeling that I am going to be team Jacob with the movies, I am not sure why hahaha he just seems better there, but books are definitely Edward. I'm just wondering, does Rob Pattinson play the guitar for the song he sang? that would be so way more impressive than him singing kehe.

OH NOO!! I am going to be all alone at work tomorrow!! (well obviously not completely alone) my crews all missing, minnie (LDS lady in my stakes ey) is away for two weeks or something because her daughter Shazbot(Sharlene, but you know how the british nick name people with the first letter of their name then add an az or ez or azza or ezze or whatever vowel they please, australians being close relatives of the british do similarly, so Cake(chika) calls her Shaz, and I call her shazbot cuz its cooler, but she doesnt know that HAHA) is getting married tomorrow, (or today) and shazbots away cuz shes getting married(Minnie's daughter, temple marriage) and Cake (Caitlin, my number one hombre) is away because shes an amateur photographer and shazbot asked her to take the pictures for her, and Ja (Rocielle, I have no idea about that one, its completely hers) is just wagging(sluffing, skipping, absconding, being in the wrong place at the right time) thats all the people i sit with at meal times, (except for saphire, but shes from pieces, and I am in marinating) so I'll be all a lonley


HAHA someone commented (I'm trying to sound all popular bloggy! haahhaha It was Maliana AlrIGht?!?) about me sounding all grown up or something, I am not sure if it was meant as sarcasm, because its just too funny hehe

Well, in keeping with what I was yammering about, (serious stuffs) I will blerg some more.. about my futures

So My big little disbanding family is moving over to the Canada, That will be very interesting and exciting. At first I was like meh, but now I am wanting to go too. So My plan, go to canada next year in the middle somewhere (middle of the year) like june or july, well anywho I need to go to sleep haha BYO for NOW


Tuesday, November 18, 2008

My hair Curls in the Rain


it's been raining like Crazy for the past few days, (its rainy time!) and it was raining as I drove home from work today, like torrential Down pouring, I could feel my car flying over the puddles because I was going to fast hehe Ye!

Let me tell you a secret! I got Christmas prezzies for my little family here in Australia, I bought my mommy the wii fit thing because she said she wanted something like that (Maliana I am not sure you will ever get that back heh heh heh) and I also got the rock band world tour wii thing, but I am not waiting for Christmas, Thats silly, its too hot to do that.

I did something REALLY stupid today, I played knuckles at work, and I flinched three times TWICE! so now my hand is swollen and grossly bruised and I can feel every movement owwieee DANG IT! I will have my revenge, REMATCH AAAAAHHH

I did another stupid thing at work, I shoved, like Nine warheads into my mouth for four dollars (hehe I eat stuff for money because I have silly friends hahaha) and it was painful for my toungue, afterwards I couldnt feel my toungue, well it felt burnedish, but my teeth felt like chalk, the acid like acided them! and they still feel funny hehe.

OH and one more thing before I go do wierd things, the mechanic man came to fix my belts because the fan belt snapped off on friday and then monday my battery light was on so i gats tha mechanics to fix its, so its all better now! or something, I was sleeping hehe Okay Laters for now! STILL super awesome excited about Twilight, but there are other things that are might happen, like going to robinvale and going to dreamworld for koreafest, and Henry is graduating on Friday, thats super cool okay I fall now



p.s. I still have no flippin clue
idea about whats going on Here
hahaha the pictures! and the
other stuffs! bleh

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

YELLOW SOCKS! I dont have any, but, one day.. One Day

HaHaHa talk about suckalicious Day Yesterday! and then Totaly awesome today, What an interesting thing.......

Hey, this thing has spell check, like in word, and the red underlining is annoying me, so I am going to have to write grammatically correct ness like, or fear the wrath of my smash the computer for my o.c.d. and then everyone smash me for the smashing of the computer. HAHA it works! well I just got major distracted! ok let me ...

So The past few weeks I worked Saturday overtime, which is intense hardcore bad for ones body, and made me exhausted and sickly. The reason for the overtime was because this weekend that just passed days ago I got Friday and Monday off because some equipment was being installed, so Guess What I did! I MOVEDDDDDDDDDDDD HAHAHHAHAHAH I am laughing with insanity, because I am no longer in my mind, in other Words, I AM OUT OF IT, my mind that is. So, I am still exhausted and sore and tired, poor sooky me.

Anyways, So I got this email today, from Miriam, and she said she is might leaving Guam, so I think I might go to asia for a week or so, just for randoms sake, we'll see what happens hmm.

Since we (the family) moved down the road, this is the last time for a long time (probably not very long, but dramaticness is super fantastico) that I will be on the internets, so GOODBYE CRUEL WORLd hahahha its late and I am tired and sore, so I am not making sense, but I am trying to relay this message, We are getting the internets at some point, but the slowness of Australia(in more than just servicce HArHar!) means it will be a week or somehting before we get it, so.... BYO



Might go to some festivals and concerts because I am ever so bored and hate everything and oh yeah, Obama won, thats interesting, I didnt think he would at all. It will be interesting to see what he does with the place haha

I can't wait to see twilight, but im so... i wonder Ok BYO FOR NOW-O